2005-01-23 - 12:17 p.m.

mom brings soup

I love my mommy! No, seriously- I mean that in a totally unironic way. She knew I was sick so she came over- she brought me three cans of vegetarian soup (harder to find than you'd think) and some oranges and grapes. She said I need to stay all well nourished to get my strength back. Yaaaay.

So what am I doing now? Heating up soup, of course. Yay for soup! I'm also listening to the Flashback Lunch on 101X (it's addictive I tell you) and sporadically working on the novel. I keep reading back over it and thinking "either this is pulp trash or the most brilliant thing ever written." I'm not sure, but I guess I can't lose. If it's pulp trash then stupid people will buy it and I won't be broke anymore, though I may want to cover my face when going out in public from the embarassment. If it's brilliant then a handful of critics will laud it and I'll have hip credibility but still no food. The worst thing would be if my novel were neither really good or really bad, but mediocre. Then it would be lost in the sea of millions of mediocre novels. My goal is to write something as dumb yet lucrative as the Davinci Code or something as defining for my generation as Catcher in the Rye or Fight Club have been. Something that speaks of the absurdity of everything in really broad terms. At the end of the day, though, what if I'm just writing the next "Foregin Bodies"? That was a book I read a couple years ago. It was unremarkable, and I couldn't finish it, which is really sad because it was written in a style very similar to my own. Now no one, even myself, remembers it.

The last thing I wrote before this thing. The next thing I wrote after this.